When I initially wrote my review for Bridgerton Season 2, Episode 8, “The Viscount Who Loved Me,” I spent a lot of time looking at Anthony and Violet’s conversation about grief. It’s one of the longest sections in my review because it’s one of the most important scenes in the entire show. I’m not quite sure how I can top what I’ve already said, but I rewatched the clip recently and realized that this is a scene that still deserves my attention. (I also bawled. Again.)
With the exception of “A Bee in Your Bonnet,” Bridgerton Season 2 doesn’t spend nearly enough time exploring the grief that continues to linger in Anthony, but Jonathan Bailey consistently gives us far more than what’s on the page by digging deeper into the character’s headspace to unpack every burden. His performance throughout all three seasons so far is what continues to layer the character in a way that makes it impossible sometimes to talk about it. But that’s the thing, I’ve written about both Anthony Bridgerton and Kate Sharma (Bridgerton) a lot by now. I’ve talked about their grief and how it’s helped me through my own, and this moment is one of those moments that just means everything.
So much of this scene between Anthony and Violet not only sticks the landing because it’s a long time coming, but because it really is an exploration of grief that we don’t see often. (That is, until Ghosts came into the picture.) But each of the Bridgerton siblings and Violet has a different relationship with how their grief impacts their day-to-day lives. To Anthony, so much of it suffocates him. Whether the book version or the show, it isn’t until he meets Kate that he finally lets some of his walls down. It catches me off guard every time I think about it because in a home where he has seven siblings, Anthony can’t share a single one of his burdens and pain until Kate. And as we know, the same goes for her.
Still, here in this moment—for the first time—Anthony lets someone see all the pain he’s carried, and it’s now coupled with the fear and terror of thinking he almost lost Kate. He might not have control over many things, but he does have control over what he allows others to see, so the fact that he allows Violet to see his heartache is entirely because he isn’t fully thinking at this moment. The relief that Kate is alive is so all-encompassing that he completely crumbles. He lets go. Fully.
He can’t hold any of his crosses up because in this very moment, nothing matters the way Kate being awake does. Her safety and her life are everything. And while a scene like this is powerful enough to work on paper, Bailey’s performance is what elevates it. The fact that we can see him visibly try to collect himself and process the emotions is no small feat, and the decision to cover his whole face with his hands as his body slightly trembles shows us how painful it all is. How raw and gut-wrenching this has all been for him. She’s alive and well, but let’s not pretend how traumatic the moment will continue to be for him. For Anthony, of all people, who simply can’t let go. The sight of her falling off the horse is something that’s going to haunt him for a long, long time.
I know. I know. We’re here to talk about the conversation with Violet. But I can’t help but wonder that this scene is often so minimized with casual viewings, because when you sit down for a few minutes and question the magnitude of how deeply Anthony loves Kate and how terrified he was, it becomes so clear that it’s not just a mere accident to brush aside.
It’s also worth pinpointing what I said in my review about the moment when Anthony actually sees Kate. “Bailey doesn’t shed Anthony’s fears of losing Kate once he learns she’s awake; he carries them like a cross throughout the entirety of [the episode] until she’s finally safe in his arms, and there’s tremendous depth in that.”
That said, the conversation that follows is ultimately icing on the cake, because for the first time, Violet also gives herself the chance to open up. She admits to her own defeat—the unthinkable heartache of losing love and how debilitating it can be. The fact that in her own grief, she couldn’t always see her son’s. How it’s wounded her and their entire family while fracturing each of their bonds. The way that she insists that he cannot lose Kate. The way she makes sure he knows he doesn’t have to go through this alone. It’s all so brilliant that I can go on and on with every frame. (How the tears in Anthony’s eyes still haunt me.) And, with this, I’m going to leave you all with the words I wrote in my initial review:
“Thus, in a moment of sheer relief, Anthony Bridgerton allows himself a moment of profound vulnerability where he isn’t merely the man of the house but a kid again—the 18-year-old boy, forced to grow up too quickly, wanting for a split moment to feel something that isn’t grief. As he covers his face in his hands, essentially fighting the incoming tears, Violet sees all of this, understanding every bit of heartbreak in the unthinkable way no one else could fathom.
And so, she speaks up again—she begins to apologize for all he’s seen and witnessed, making it clear that she wants him to understand how deserving he is of real, true love. She tells him that she would choose the life she lived with Edmund every single time, despite knowing that she’d lose him, because real, true love is worth it. The amount of adoration and strength that Gemmell packs into the words you cannot lose her are paramount.
There’s also much to be said about how she holds his hand. He might be grown a man, but he is her firstborn—the one she fussed over like he was made of porcelain, terrified that he could break at any moment, never realizing that’s what would happen to him internally.* Somewhere along the way, her precious boy’s heart became impenetrable, leaving her in complete desolation because she never knew how to make matters right. She never understood the depth of his trauma or how to piece those broken pieces of him back together.
But Violet tries, for a moment, she holds her son’s hand tighter than she has in years, and she uncovers it all for him, making sure that he understands with every word and every tear that none of this darkness is his own doing. She makes sure that he understands love can heal him even if it breaks him further, because nothing compares to having someone who sees you for all that you truly are. Bridgerton 2×08 brings to the surface conversations that are perfectly late in ways that ultimately work for relatable storytelling.”
Bridgerton is now streaming on Netflix. Do you still cry over this Anthony and Violet scene, or are you normal? Let us know in the comments below.
First Featured Image Credit: ©Netflix